I found Mark Batterson’s book “The Circle Maker” on the giveaway table of my apartments a few months ago. The title intrigued me and as I read further the fact that it was a book about powerful prayers. I was hooked.
Praying is one of those things I struggle with. I always have. I still don’t feel competent at it, but I do know that has a lot to do with my struggles with having relationships, especially with males. Reading “The Circle Maker” I was inspired to dive deeper into my fears of praying.
My fears are: sounding stupid, not praying for the right things, sounding selfish, not trusting or believing that God will answer them or give me the right path. I know, I know I should trust Jesus, but I still struggle with this. If you have read my blog then you know that I am a walking miracle. From the first scary surgery in 2010 and then all the surgeries that came after that and then there is the healing of my throat through the medications and changing how I am choosing to live my life. I think God more than proved himself, but still have that twinge of uncertainty, that fear, that deep seeded fear of opening up my heart and being vulnerable.
I took Batterson’s suggestion in the back of this book and started praying deeply and listening to God about what my goals should be. I worked up a list for my own journal. I know my biggest wish is to be trachless and I am praying circles around August 4th that this will happen. I have a lot more.
It is time for me to face my fears, fully put my heart and soul into Jesus and His path for me and start taking those steps.
I am letting one of my older sisters borrow this book so that she can feel more powerful while she prays. I have a feeling that the women in my family do not feel valuable or like their prayers matter. I know that feeling well, but now that I am growing older, diving deeper into God’s word and opening myself up I realize thata this is not the truth. I hope that you will find a copy of “The Circle Maker” and dive into a praying life full of miracles and trust.