My Fears

“There is no fear in love dread does not exist but full-grown complete perfect love turns fear out of doors and expels every trace of error! For fear brings with it the thought of punishment and so he who is afraid has not reached the full maturity of love is not yet grown into love’s complete perfection.”  1 John 4:18 (Amplified)

Fear, man does this plaque my mind and stops me in my tracks. I have been afraid. I have been afraid of changing my life. The way I eat, the way I move, the way I breathe, and the way I have relationship with others. I have been living in fear for a long time.

Reading 1 John 4: 18 I realized that fear does not do me any good and that I must change this aspect of myself. Love is not fear based. Love is hope based. Something in my mind snapped. I have been fearful of my pulmonary exercises, so I have not been doing them. First, I feel like such an old lady doing them. I also am fearful of what this might mean. That I am sick and I am not capable of doing more. How is that speaking loving to my body?

5 days ago I started. I started doing my pulmonary exercises. I started walking on the treadmill. Yes, I am only able to do 3 minutes right now, but I know that in time I will be able to do 30 minutes. I interchange the pulmonary exercises with the treadmill because if I do both on the same I do too much for my body. I have to listen to my body. Thursday I also started tracking my food on myfitnesspal. I have started making meals ahead. I made a yummy rice casserole. I am not a big fan of rice, but I have to admit this casserole was good. I probably will be making it again. I also roasted some carrots, broccoli, red onions, and lemons ahead of time so I can easily grab them.

On day 5 of this attitude adjustment I found “Eating Well For Optimum Health” by Andrew Weil. I have admired Weil from afar only reading his website, which doesn’t truly dive deeper into eating well for inflammation issues. I am looking forward to reading this book and marking the pages with my highlighter which I am sure I will do.  And I look forward to making some of the recipes I saw in the back. Tomorrow while I am driving up to Seattle with my sister in law I know I will ample opportunity to read Weil’s book. I made a decision and then a book that will guide me through the best eating life style I can shows up. Isn’t God amazing?