You were probably wondering why I haven’t written for the last couple of days. I was in the hospital fighting an infection just below my trach. Wednesday evening around 5 PM I noticed that the infection was growing even after I started my antibiotics. It got so big it started pressing at the bottom of my metal trach, ouch. So I called my lovely sister in law and asked her to take me to the ER in which I endured another procedure, but this time they actually numbed me a bit since it didn’t directly involve my breathing. After cutting it open they made a drain in order for the hole to stay open and the infection to start oozing out. Yuck! I ended up being admitted so they can start antibiotic infusions for a 24 hour period. I received 6 of them. Two different ones and I did not like the experience at all. The nurses were great and even the doctors, but there is nothing like my own environment.
Consequently I had to postpone my infusion that I was going to be having on May 13th and rescheduled it for June 5th. While at the hospital I met some neat people there who I can tell are fighters. One is from Bosnia and she is working herself up. I love her spirit. I find it interesting that when I pay attention I get to learn about my doctors and the nurses and why they became what they are now.
The most amazing thing happened, I have been feeling rather run downed, worthless, and most of wondering why I am fighting so much. Yes, this positive butterfly has those moments. It has been 4 years and what the heck am I doing to impact my world? Those are my thoughts. Well Dr. Lam whom is the Dr. who I was taking care of me while I was in the hospital came into my room yesterday and started telling me she talked to my doctors. All of them saying the same thing about me they love me and they love how I continue my good attitude despite my obstacles and that they want me to continue to fight on to be honest I never have heard that from a doctor in my life, but I have gotten the look of surprise and comments from them about my good attitude and perspective. I am processing this new information and working on my plan for my next steps on my health, getting my weight down so I can function and be healthy. I get so discouraged and I stop trying. This bothers me.
Today will be a big day, my caregiver has graciously offered to take my grocery shopping since we were supposed to go on Thursday but I ended up in the hospital instead. We are going this morning. Have a great Saturday… Enjoy the sunshine.