Matthew 11: 2-5
This morning in my time with God I read about doubt. John the Baptist had doubt about Jesus being the ONE. He asked Jesus: “Are You the One who has to come or should we keep on expecting a different one?”
I have never fully absorbed this part of the scripture before. When I hear people talk or share scripture this is one that is not used a lot, who wants to hear about a prophet, a cousin of Jesus being doubtful about who he is. You see John was in prison, suffering and I am sure he knew he was about to be beheaded, so his doubting mind took over for a moment. I love that this scripture is in the bible; it gives me insight, hope, and makes me say hey I am not alone.
Doubt is common ailments that all of us human beings have, even if we do not want to admit to ourselves, each other, or even to God. I have my doubts about many things all the time, whether or not I am hearing God correcting, why am I going through this unknown illness, why do I have to experience having a throat that constricts making it hard to breathe, if there was a God would he allow me to suffer this way, and so forth. I struggle, I ache, and I feel doubtful about my experiences and such.
Along with the doubts comes the moment of inspiring awe towards an amazing Jesus who has stood by me despite my doubt. I love Jesus’ answer for John he says: “Go and report to John what you hear and see. The blind receive their sight and the lame walk, lepers are cleansed by healing and the deaf hear, the dead are raised up and the poor have good news preached to them.” Jesus gave John the exact thing he needed, proof of Jesus being the One. Jesus wasn’t angry, ego driven, or didn’t reply with “you are doubting me, I curse you”. No he responded with love and gave John the evidence he needed to restore his faith.
God has done that for me many times as I have journeyed on my path of illness and recovery. No, I am not fully healed in my body, but in other areas in my life I am being healed. In how I view and interact with those I am in relationship with, in how I view negative feedback and news, and in how I choose to be who I am in Him no matter what others think, believe, or say. Being in relationship with Jesus is a personal experience.
So I have my moments of doubt still, but I know in my heart and soul that no matter what Jesus will give me what I need in those moments.
What does Jesus show you in your moments of doubt?